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 Oh, honey, I am not telling you I don t care for you. I m telling you I love you. I love
you, body and soul.
She blinked, her eyes confused then horrified.
He tried to bring her close but she pulled back.  I love you, Jess. I always have. I got
tired of waiting for you and this time when I came home, I vowed to tell you, show you how
much I cared for you. I hope I did. He pushed a stray curl from her brow.  Tell me you
know I love you.
She gazed outside again, looking for the truth of what he said. Finally, she looked at
him again and nodded once.  I I do.
 What you don t know is that the other reason I wanted to show you this now is
because I have a decision to make about my military career.
She frowned.
 While I m here on leave this time, I am also deciding if I want to re-up for another
enlistment term. I m tired of war, Jess. I m tired of seeing my men destroyed by bombs and
bullets and the desperation of re-deployments back to the desert. I want a family. I want to
come home to some peace and quiet and love. I want to come home to you, Jess. I love you
and I need you. These hours away with you have convinced me that I have always only
needed you, honey.
Tears rolled down her cheeks then.
 Don t cry, honey. I m asking you to marry me.
She shrank away from him.
HARD DRIVIN MAN Cerise DeLand
44
He couldn t believe it. After how he d worked to make her laugh, love her, she was
crying.  What s the matter, sweetheart? I thought I had shown you how much I care.
 You did. Oh, Trey, you did! But I I don t know if I can do this, make this decision.
 What? Why not?
 I need to think about it. I need to be away from you and think about it.
He brushed her tears from her cheeks, his heart pounding with a sorrow he couldn t see
the bottom of.  My leave is up Friday. When I report, I have to tell my CO whether I m in or
out for the next three years. I need to know, Jess, if I can come home to you or if I m going to
live without you for the rest of my life.
 Trey, you need to decide so soon?
 Yes, once and for all. I won t come back and run this ranch unless you ll have me, Jess.
I couldn t live close to you and not have you. I won t live my life any longer with you just
beyond my reach.
 But how can you ask me to decide whether to change my life so quickly?
 Call it short, call it unfair. I ve known you all my life, Jess. I m giving you twenty-four
hours to tell me whether you love me and whether you ll marry me.
 A day?
 It s all I have, Jess. All any of us has right now. Meet me at the creek at dusk tomorrow
night. Tell me your decision then. I can t wait any longer, Jess. I ve spent my life loving you
and I either have to do it with wedding rings and kids and laughter and tears or not at all.
* * * *
The sun glowed a bright red through the live oak trees at dusk the next day as Jess
walked the barbed wire fence that divided the Rocking H from her own property. Jumpy as
a cat on hot coals, she patted her mare and scanned the horizon for Trey.
A few more minutes and dusk would be over, disappeared behind the far western
ridge, bringing night and darkness to the day and her past.
She rested her forehead against the saddle of her horse and tried to push out the horror
her day had been. What agony she d felt to know she could choose love again and be
wrong. Or choose love once more and take a chance this time she could get it right.
HARD DRIVIN MAN Cerise DeLand
45
She surveyed the creek below, one of Trey s that ran deeper than any on her land. Was
Trey like that? Running deeper, dearer, than Clint ever could have? Could brothers be
different?
Logic said yes. She had lived with Clint for sixteen years. He had been a jovial teenager,
but as a man he became self-centred, morose, and addicted to a substance that took his will-
power and weakened him. As he declined in health, he and she hadn t slept together and
hadn t communicated like husband and wife for more than eight years. By the time he had
been accidently trampled by one of their bulls, he d ruined his liver, his heart and their
chances for any normal relationship.
That s what came of her teenage love affair. A flame of passion that turned her head,
thrilled her young body and ruined the years of young adulthood. Now here she was
fascinated by her old friend, Clint s brother. If she had been a fool to go with Trey to Big
Bend, she consoled herself that the two days with him had renewed her spirits, taught her
how to laugh again and made her see that she wasn t some thirty eight year-old hag who
was dried up and dead.
The sound of hooves pounding the dry earth had her turning to the vision of Trey on a
black stallion.
God. How you make me want and weep to have you, Trey.
He rode right up to her, his black Stetson greying out his features until he pulled up
beside her. Jeans, starched white shirt, huge silver belt buckle, all attire for a devilish hunk of
man. But he looked like he d been up all night. His eyes haggard, his jaw lax. He touched his
hat brim like any polite Texas gentleman.  How are you, Jess?
 As awful as you, I think, she told him the truth.
He flinched and looked away as the last sliver of the red sun sank behind the far ridge,
blanketing them in grey light.  What s it gonna be, Jess?
She put a hand to his thigh.  Please, Trey. Climb down and let me talk to you.
 I don t need talk. A simple yes or no will do.
 Trey, I have an answer for you, but I need to tell you how I came to that conclusion.
He examined her features.
 If we can t talk about this, how will we ever live with ourselves? she persuaded him.
He slid down, looping his reins around a tree limb to secure his huge beast of a stallion
next to her mare.
HARD DRIVIN MAN Cerise DeLand
46
 Daisy likes your man, Jess smiled at the way the two horses nodded to acknowledge
each other.
Trey had his hands on his hips as he swung to face her.  I m ready. Talk, Jess.
 Despite the fact that you know I like jelly beans and oysters and a few other things,
too, you don t know everything about me, Trey.
 I know enough to love you, Jess.
 Yes, she affirmed.  I see that.
 You gave me twenty-four hours and frankly, you freaked me out.
 All I ve got, baby! He raised his arms and let them fall to his sides.
 Thinking about this wasn t easy.
He snorted.  Tell me something I don t know.
Frustrated with her own lack of speed and with his despair, she ran a hand over her
brow, dislodging her own hat. Catching it, she dropped it to the ground.  After Clint died, I
told myself I would live my life alone. I d never marry again. Never find anyone I could love.
There were no men around here who attracted me. None, especially since you weren t here. I
ached for someone to love, to share with, to talk with and help me with decisions about the
ranch. My dad had never done too well as a rancher. Clint was not much better. Then, of
course, he drank himself blind. And I blamed myself for choosing him.
Trey frowned.  I don t understand. [ Pobierz całość w formacie PDF ]

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